That is a challenging riddle, unless you have read the recent book Primates of Park Avenue.
The author, an anthropologist, lived on the Upper East Side and decided to apply scientific principles to understand and describe the behavior of well-heeled UES women. As you can guess, what might seem normal and de rigeur to the subjects seems a bit foreign to others. From appearance to behavior, the book spells out what makes for a typical Park Avenue Primate.
After arriving in NYC, we noticed many of the Primates in their natural habitat, usually along Park or Madison Avenues. In fact, we developed a game of sorts--Spot the Primate. Here are some playing tips if you are interested:
After arriving in NYC, we noticed many of the Primates in their natural habitat, usually along Park or Madison Avenues. In fact, we developed a game of sorts--Spot the Primate. Here are some playing tips if you are interested:
- Giveways include blonde hair and skinny frames, plus average or above-average height (with or without heels), excellent makeup and stylish outfits that probably cost more than most people earn in a week.
- Telltale signs are Lululemon workout clothes and going in or out of the trendiest of gyms, such as SoulCycle.
- Rarely will a Primate have a child or spouse in tow. Naturally, the spouse is at work at a hedge fund while the children are with the nanny or in a selective school.
- On the streets, Primates walk purposefully and are usually smile-less. It's curious about the absence of smiles. Perhaps it is due to the burden of carrying a heavy designer bag?
Perhaps some enterprising person will start a Primates tour, like other NYC tours--the Gossip Girl tour, the Sex and the City tour and the Mad Men Cocktail tour.
Pop Quiz: Which of the following are Primates of Park Avenue?
Answer: All of the above. (The last one is a photo of Wednesday Martin, author of Primates of Park Avenue. Does it take one to know one?)
P.S. As you probably know, Dr. Jane Goodall is a world-renowned anthropologist who has studied primates (chimpanzees) in Tanzania for more than half a century. Many years ago, Gary Larson published the cartoon below, which led to a negative reaction from the staff at the Jane Goodall Institute. When Jane Goodall learned of the cartoon, she was pleased by the humor and put the matter to rest since it was all in good fun. Apparently, Gary Larson later visited the Institute and one of the primates roughed him up a bit. It was probably all in good fun.
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